Filed under: The Unexplainable Things that Seem to Only Occur to Me | Tags: emotions and other disasters, rilo kiley, the pains of being pure at heart, we're just portion for foxes
Listening to Portion for Foxes by Rilo Kiley on repeat. Deja Vu? Maybe a little. We might just be two fucks in lust. Everyone else seems certain of it.
Today’s picnic was mad fun. I reckon it’s been a while since everyone got together and just drank and laughed and made silly chit chat. Too bad Marcus wasn’t there to join in the merry making. We should definitely make this a bi-monthly event.
Too drunk and tired to say anything of substantial intelligence. Another night I suppose. Bonne Nuit
Filed under: The Unexplainable Things that Seem to Only Occur to Me, Travel | Tags: KL KL BOLEH, my abandonment issues
Oh KL, I’ve missed you so. We are going to eat awesome food, drink awesome beer, and soak in each other’s awesomness.
I am majorly stoked.
On a completely unrelated note, the reality of this unmentioned situation is that although I might appear to care less than I really do, I am really scared shitless of it. People always leave and I’ve got my sweat shop Nikes already laced up. If I left, would you run after?
Am I being ambiguous enough? I should think so. If you’re not going to be allowed to pretend to be vague and mysterious over the internet, then where else would you get to?
Filed under: Life | Tags: do you like to hurt - i do i do, lolling around, my poetic re-telling of an unfortunate seduction, pan's labyrinth
(Click to enlarge.)
I spent most of the day lolling (that’s our lingo for LOLing and rolling) around the den with D, putting on movie after movie, our laptops propped against our knees, half watching and half chatting with our favorite bag of baked chips and salsa dip handy. Just like old times. This kid rocks so hard. If tomorrow he told me to run away to Tahiti with him, I would pack up in a heart beat.
Shaun gave me a call today to ‘catch up’, oh how sweet of him to remember I was still alive and stuck in this wretched hell hole he left behind. He’ll be back during the summer for a while – I’m quite sure the wave of nausea I felt following the news was not an indication of my sheer excitement. The conversation went surprisingly pleasant – five years diluted quite a bit of his usual emotional malice and inconsolable misery. Wow, has it already been that long? I still remember the long drives to nowhere, getting drugged and drunk on bitter pills and cheap spirits, lying in bed the whole day with our favorite bands on repeat his hand against mine. What a match made in heaven; so meant for each other that we left our hearts at opposite places.
Still waiting on that motherfucking gun so I can blow someone’s brains out. In the mean time, I’m quite certain Guillermo del Toro’s bizarre imagination will haunt me tonight.
Post-Script: 3am I added in a Twitter RSS feed to the left panel of my site because the WordPress twats are too 2008 to create a proper widget for it and a little About Me page for the occasional blog stumbler. In due time, I will also be transfering the past 6 years of my online presence from various web journaling sites into this blog to archive because I reckon it’s time to cash in on my life – Wikipedia says in the 18th century, memoirs were largely written by prostitutes or libertines for their vulgar details and gossip. Move over Audrina and Justin Bobby, I think I’ve got enough material for 10 new seasons of The Hills.
Filed under: The Unexplainable Things that Seem to Only Occur to Me | Tags: you'll sleep when you're dead
I want to punch someone in the mouth so hard. And not in the kinky sort of Candy Cane way (re:getting a blowjob from a girl and punching her in the nose so she bleeds as you come on her face ha ha!) Not really sure what kind of bee is under my bonnet but I reckon it’s a combination of being completely exhausted, fake festivity cheer and just fucking humanity in general.
Don’t get me wrong I love people, but the incessant whining and prodding and dragging of feet (i know, hello pot are you calling the kettle black) is maddening. Right now, I feel like unleashing a semi circle quarter punch combo of death stares, biting snaps and shin kick attacks on some poor unfortunate bastard just at the wrong place at the wrong time. I am not afraid of you and I will beat your ass.
If I said earlier that I’d like someone to do nothing with, I’ve changed my mind. I only want to do nothing with myself. The sight of people make me sick right now. I think I just need to get away from everyone for a while.
Filed under: The Unexplainable Things that Seem to Only Occur to Me, Too Much Info | Tags: french cries and whaaaamburgers, John Mayer, please sir may I have some more, The Josie Window
JOSIE for the the love of god, SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Now I know why the whole world wants him to sit the fuck down.
Filed under: The Unexplainable Things that Seem to Only Occur to Me | Tags: Do not go gentle into that good night, Rage - rage against the dying of the light, That's right bitch
Apparently I have been given some guide lines as to what I can or cannot talk about on this blog. Needless to say, I am extremely displeased.
Look, I’m really really sorry if you accidentally Facebook stalked me, unintentionally found my blog url, mistakenly clicked on it and unwittingly read all of my entries.
BRB, I’m off to pencil the rest of my thoughts down in my offline book journal like it’s 1994. Censor that, bitch.
Filed under: Too Much Info
Still talking shit but you’re the one eating it. This is not a coincidence, there is no such thing.
Filed under: Life | Tags: friday nights at the drive-in bingo, my dirty little secret, twitter, twitter addictions
Douglas Coupland says that your ability to rationalize your own bad deeds makes you believe that the whole world is as amoral as you are. One day I will be famous enough to have my own quotations page on the interweb. We sip from the venomous cup of life until our hearts turn hard, our heads filled with hate and our eyes gone blind.
I don’t think the whole world is as amoral as I am – guile and malice require a certain artful brilliance to master. This multi-tasking intelligence (fortunately) is simply not what majority of society is capable of. That’s right white collared workers I see in the train every day: live your simple little shy lives with your simple little nice wives, keep your babies fat, your vision tunneled and your thoughts to yourself.
There are two types of nice people. The first group are kind and generous and willing – and stupid. The ones you trample all over because they are just too oblivious or refuse to acknowledge the ugly nature of human kind. The ones that are always bitten and never shy.
And there are the gentle lambs. The meek and gentle unobtrusive types. Their weakness make you fear for their safety in this horrible horrible world and you feel bounded – to take care of them, nurture them, protect them.
Obviously not being a very good person, I fall into neither. I’m not kind, or gracious or polite and I am extremely unapologetic about it. There is something too artificial, too unreal, too feigned about being wholesome. It unsettles me.
You are a stark, blank canvas – devoid of character and personality…but I am sure you are very very very nice.
Questions to ask yourself when you’re home on a Friday night:
1. Why do people care so much about what bare strangers think of them
2. Who’s going to be the angriest when I publish a tell-all memoir of my illicit love affairs and melodramatic escapades
I think my narcissism isn’t getting any better no thanks to the twitter addiction. Oh yes, you want to know what I’m doing and you want to find out this instant! www.twitter.com/omgitsjosie
Today I realized that along with the list of my jilted ex-lovers, I might have more people interested in breaking into my apartment while I am fast asleep and smother me dead.
People…people can be so harsh.
Be still my beating heart; I have never felt more alive.
Filed under: Life, The Unexplainable Things that Seem to Only Occur to Me | Tags: emotions and other diasasters, the awful sweetness of escaping sweet
He pretended to get all nervous and acted like he couldn’t find the words to say. But then all too suddenly he took my hand in his, looked at me with those bambi eyes – and we kissed. It was so innocent and beautiful at the same time.
I have to tell you. I just don’t know how.
For now I will remain wide awake and think about why 4 years later, I am still unhappy with every single thing that I do.
